My first Beaverton piece
May. 24th, 2025 11:54 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
james_davis_nicollI am torn between squeals of glee and WORSHIP ME AS YOUR GOD.
ChatGPT user delighted to combine sloth with theft
ChatGPT user delighted to combine sloth with theft
james_davis_nicoll
Books Received, May 17 — May 23
May. 24th, 2025 09:11 amjames_davis_nicoll
Seven books new to me. 3 fantasies, 1 horror, 1 non-fiction, and 2 science fiction. 2are stand-alone, 3 are series and 2 fall into the ever popular inapplicable set.
Books Received, May 17 — May 23
Poll #33156 Books Received, May 17 — May 23
Open to: Registered Users, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 44
Which of these look interesting?
View Answers
After the Fall by Edward Ashton (February 2026)
20 (45.5%)
Three Shattered Souls by Mai Corland (July 2025)
3 (6.8%)
Gemini by Jeffrey Kluger (November 2025)
8 (18.2%)
Cinder House by Freya Marske (October 2025)
14 (31.8%)
The Essential Patricia A. McKillip by Patricia A. McKillip (October 2025)
24 (54.5%)
The First Thousand Trees by Premee Mohamed (September 2025)
15 (34.1%)
Night Terror: A Bleak Haven Novel by Vincent Ralph (January 2026)
3 (6.8%)
Some other option (see comments)
0 (0.0%)
Cats!
30 (68.2%)
(no subject)
May. 24th, 2025 01:47 amtwistedchickI discovered a few years ago that when I put substances on my skin I can taste them within 30 seconds, with a few exceptions. That led to not wearing foundation, or most makeup (various flavors of odd), sunscreen (nasty burning plastic flavor, and no, I can't explain why burning), and lipstick (fermented plastic flavor). I can wear eyeliner and some concealers, and that's about it. I can use Burt's Bees plain lipbalm, which has mint oil.
Sunscreen is the problem, though. Since I can't use the chemical stuff, I have been trying to find a natural oil that has a decent SPF. Olive oil is about SPF 4-8, which is something but not enough. I heard that avocado oil is higher than SPF 15, so I swiped some from the kitchen and tried it. Unfortunately, it does not behave like olive oil, which eventually sinks in a little and dulls. The avocado stays shiny and oily looking, enough that someone asked me how hot it was outdoors since she thought it was sweat. Um. not good.
Any thoughts on this? I've tried the light powder sunscreen and it's not enough screen for me.
Sunscreen is the problem, though. Since I can't use the chemical stuff, I have been trying to find a natural oil that has a decent SPF. Olive oil is about SPF 4-8, which is something but not enough. I heard that avocado oil is higher than SPF 15, so I swiped some from the kitchen and tried it. Unfortunately, it does not behave like olive oil, which eventually sinks in a little and dulls. The avocado stays shiny and oily looking, enough that someone asked me how hot it was outdoors since she thought it was sweat. Um. not good.
Any thoughts on this? I've tried the light powder sunscreen and it's not enough screen for me.
conuly posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
agonyauntDEAR ABBY: My dear friend, "Sandra," is married with two children. She and her husband have a 4-year-old son together and another son from her husband's first marriage who is 14. The 14-year-old's life is tough, much like Cinderella's. Sandra treats him very badly. She has him doing all of the housework in their home, belittles him constantly and is very vocal about how much she dislikes him. Her 4-year-old can do no wrong.
The older boy's mother has weekends with her son, but Sandra is open about not liking her either. I feel bad about how the boy is treated and want to talk to Sandra about it, but I don't know how to bring up the sensitive subject and maintain my relationship with the family. Her husband is completely on Sandra's side, so he does nothing to help the boy have a better life. Can you offer any advice? -- FEELING FOR HIM IN WASHINGTON
( Read more... )
The older boy's mother has weekends with her son, but Sandra is open about not liking her either. I feel bad about how the boy is treated and want to talk to Sandra about it, but I don't know how to bring up the sensitive subject and maintain my relationship with the family. Her husband is completely on Sandra's side, so he does nothing to help the boy have a better life. Can you offer any advice? -- FEELING FOR HIM IN WASHINGTON
( Read more... )
Book Review Poll
May. 23rd, 2025 10:18 amrachelmanijaI have been reading much more than I've been reviewing. So...
Have you read any of these? What did you think?
Open to: Registered Users, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 135
Which of these books would you MOST like me to review?
View Answers
When the Wolf Comes Home, by Nat Cassidy. Horror novel about an out of work actress on the run with a little boy.
13 (9.6%)
The Adventures of Amina al-Sirafi, by Shannon Chakraborty. The rollicking adventures of a middle-aged mom PIRATE in fantasy medieval Middle East.
71 (52.6%)
Diary of a Witchcraft Shop, by Trevor Jones and Liz Williams. What it says on the can: a diary of owning a witchcraft shop in Glastonbury.
22 (16.3%)
Sisters of the Vast Black, by Nina Rather. SPACE NUNS aboard a GIANT SPACE SEA SLUG.
50 (37.0%)
Making Bombs for Hitler, by Marsha Forchuk Skrypuch. Children's historical fiction about Ukrainian children kidnapped and enslaved in WWII, by a Ukrainian-Canadian author.
18 (13.3%)
Under One Banner, by Graydon Saunders. Commonweal # 4!
18 (13.3%)
Archangel (etc), by Sharon Shinn. Lost colony romantic SF about genetically engineered angels.
29 (21.5%)
The 7 1/2 Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle, by Stuart Turton. Historical murder mystery with time loops and body switching.
29 (21.5%)
Irontown Blues, by John Varley. Faux-noir SF with an intelligent dog.
11 (8.1%)
Blood Over Bright Haven, by M. L. Wang. Standalone fantasy that kind of looks like romantast but isn't, with anvillicious anti-colonial themes.
18 (13.3%)
An Immense World, by Ed Yong. Outstanding nonfiction about how animals sense the world.
44 (32.6%)
Spring, Summer, Asteroid, Bird: The Art of Eastern Storytelling, by Henry Lien ("Peasprout Chen"). Nonfiction, what it says on the can. Not all stories are in three acts!
39 (28.9%)
Blacktongue Thief, by Christopher Buehlman. World's greatest D&D campaign in a truly fucked world.
20 (14.8%)
Have you read any of these? What did you think?
Aunt Tigress by Emily Yu-Xuan Qin
May. 23rd, 2025 09:52 amjames_davis_nicoll
News that her supernatural aunt has been murdered upends a young woman's life.
Aunt Tigress by Emily Yu-Xuan Qin
Two similar letters, originally posted years apart
May. 22nd, 2025 06:43 pmconuly posting in agonyaunt1. Dear Carolyn: My mom basically despises my boyfriend, “Tom,” because he didn’t graduate from college and works a blue-collar job. She is so rude to him, we can’t even be around her. She defends this by saying that looking at us together makes her feel disgusted, she can’t help how she feels, and she’s being as nice as she can given the intensity of her feelings. Tom actually cried after our last dinner with my parents.
Tom and I are 24, are independently financially stable and have lived together for six months — another source of my mother’s angst, but I suspect if I were “shacking up” with a more “eligible” bachelor, she would deal just fine. Although I am beyond furious at her treatment of Tom, I don’t want to lose her. Our relationship no longer resembles the mother-daughter bond we used to have. I’m also scared about what this is doing to my parents’ marriage. My dad is saying things to her in a tone I’ve never heard before — telling her that her behavior is unacceptable, that she needs to stop. She just gets defensive and yells at him. I don’t want my relationship to be their undoing.
I love Tom and could see us getting engaged in a year or two. However, I’m actually thinking about breaking up with him over this, although I know evil shouldn’t triumph. But I feel like he’s on one side, and on the other side is my relationship with my mom AND my parents’ relationship AND the potential to have it all if I meet a college-educated suitor. (I feel like a horrible person saying this.)
( Read more... )
******
2. Dear Annie: I am a 26-year-old woman deeply in love with someone my parents can't stand. He's not what they envisioned for me; he's rough around the edges, has tattoos, rides a motorcycle and works with his hands for a living. My parents like clean-cut, college-educated types in suits, and he's the complete opposite.
Yes, he has a bit of a "bad boy" past. He's made some mistakes in his younger years -- got into trouble, partied too hard, even had a brush with the law. But that was years ago. Since then, he's turned his life around. He's steady, loyal, hardworking, and treats me with more respect and care than anyone I've ever dated.
Despite all that, my parents won't give him a chance. They're polite when he's around, but I can tell they're just waiting for me to wake up and realize he's "not good enough." They constantly drop hints about finding someone "more suitable" or "more stable," and it's starting to wear me down. I feel caught in the middle -- between a man I love and parents I don't want to disappoint.
I'm not blind to his flaws, but I believe in the man he is now. How do I move forward when the people I've always looked to for support can't accept the person I've chosen? Am I being naive for thinking love is enough, or are my parents judging him unfairly? -- Torn Between Love and Loyalty
( Read more... )
Tom and I are 24, are independently financially stable and have lived together for six months — another source of my mother’s angst, but I suspect if I were “shacking up” with a more “eligible” bachelor, she would deal just fine. Although I am beyond furious at her treatment of Tom, I don’t want to lose her. Our relationship no longer resembles the mother-daughter bond we used to have. I’m also scared about what this is doing to my parents’ marriage. My dad is saying things to her in a tone I’ve never heard before — telling her that her behavior is unacceptable, that she needs to stop. She just gets defensive and yells at him. I don’t want my relationship to be their undoing.
I love Tom and could see us getting engaged in a year or two. However, I’m actually thinking about breaking up with him over this, although I know evil shouldn’t triumph. But I feel like he’s on one side, and on the other side is my relationship with my mom AND my parents’ relationship AND the potential to have it all if I meet a college-educated suitor. (I feel like a horrible person saying this.)
( Read more... )
2. Dear Annie: I am a 26-year-old woman deeply in love with someone my parents can't stand. He's not what they envisioned for me; he's rough around the edges, has tattoos, rides a motorcycle and works with his hands for a living. My parents like clean-cut, college-educated types in suits, and he's the complete opposite.
Yes, he has a bit of a "bad boy" past. He's made some mistakes in his younger years -- got into trouble, partied too hard, even had a brush with the law. But that was years ago. Since then, he's turned his life around. He's steady, loyal, hardworking, and treats me with more respect and care than anyone I've ever dated.
Despite all that, my parents won't give him a chance. They're polite when he's around, but I can tell they're just waiting for me to wake up and realize he's "not good enough." They constantly drop hints about finding someone "more suitable" or "more stable," and it's starting to wear me down. I feel caught in the middle -- between a man I love and parents I don't want to disappoint.
I'm not blind to his flaws, but I believe in the man he is now. How do I move forward when the people I've always looked to for support can't accept the person I've chosen? Am I being naive for thinking love is enough, or are my parents judging him unfairly? -- Torn Between Love and Loyalty
( Read more... )
The Judas Contract by Marv Wolfman & George Pérez
May. 22nd, 2025 08:56 amjames_davis_nicoll
Who is the secret traitor? The former boy wonder, the wonder girl, the alien princess, the cyborg, the shape-shifter, the spooky witch, the speedster, or the geokinetic who frequently brags about being evil and betraying the team?
The Judas Contract by Marv Wolfman & George Pérez
wednesday media
May. 21st, 2025 03:13 pmisisWhat I recently finished watching:
S3 of Dark Winds, which GRRM (who is an executive producer of the show) makes a cameo in, hee. Also Jenna Elfman guest stars as an FBI investigator in from DC. This one goes hard on the "dark" part of the title, with some fairly gruesome crimes going on, as well as the emotional darkness from the fallout of the events of the previous season.
As usual I really enjoyed seeing my local landscapes, and the general Indian-country vibe of the show. (As I've mentioned before, I live not far from Navajo, though the local tribe is actually the Southern Ute; also, the college down the road is free for enrolled tribal members of any US tribe.) I was less a fan of how the season really consisted of very separate storylines, Bernie in the Border Patrol and Joe and Jim on the rez, however, the Navajo police investigation was well integrated with Joe's personal story, which made it all that more interesting. (Also here I have to admit that although I like Jim Chee as a character, I don't find him very attractive - a combination of Kiowa Gordon's chubby face and his truly dreadful 1970's costuming - so the romantic storyline was a little flat for me.)
However, damn do I love Bernie! However, her storyline confused me a bit, because it started out being about human trafficking but ended up being about drugs? But there was also a frightened Mexican family involved? Not sure what was going on there. I did figure out before the reveal who the bad guys and the complicit guys were (and heh, I bet the Republicans are none too pleased at the show painting the Border Patrol as a den of corruption) and wow, the ending of that bit was very kickass.
What I'm watching now:
S2 of Andor, which I only remember certain points from S1 so I was pretty confused during the first episode. Hopefully it will become clear(er) after the second episode, tonight.
S3 of Dark Winds, which GRRM (who is an executive producer of the show) makes a cameo in, hee. Also Jenna Elfman guest stars as an FBI investigator in from DC. This one goes hard on the "dark" part of the title, with some fairly gruesome crimes going on, as well as the emotional darkness from the fallout of the events of the previous season.
As usual I really enjoyed seeing my local landscapes, and the general Indian-country vibe of the show. (As I've mentioned before, I live not far from Navajo, though the local tribe is actually the Southern Ute; also, the college down the road is free for enrolled tribal members of any US tribe.) I was less a fan of how the season really consisted of very separate storylines, Bernie in the Border Patrol and Joe and Jim on the rez, however, the Navajo police investigation was well integrated with Joe's personal story, which made it all that more interesting. (Also here I have to admit that although I like Jim Chee as a character, I don't find him very attractive - a combination of Kiowa Gordon's chubby face and his truly dreadful 1970's costuming - so the romantic storyline was a little flat for me.)
However, damn do I love Bernie! However, her storyline confused me a bit, because it started out being about human trafficking but ended up being about drugs? But there was also a frightened Mexican family involved? Not sure what was going on there. I did figure out before the reveal who the bad guys and the complicit guys were (and heh, I bet the Republicans are none too pleased at the show painting the Border Patrol as a den of corruption) and wow, the ending of that bit was very kickass.
What I'm watching now:
S2 of Andor, which I only remember certain points from S1 so I was pretty confused during the first episode. Hopefully it will become clear(er) after the second episode, tonight.
Bundle of Holding: Awfully Cheerful Engine
May. 21st, 2025 02:17 pmjames_davis_nicoll
The complete Omnibus with the rules and eight settings for Awfully Cheerful Engine, the cinematic action-comedy tabletop roleplaying game.
Bundle of Holding: Awfully Cheerful Engine
Five SFF Works About Meddling, Mystery-Solving Kids
May. 21st, 2025 10:09 amjames_davis_nicoll
Darn kids, always battling ghosts and exposing conspiracies and making a mess...
Five SFF Works About Meddling, Mystery-Solving Kids
Bundle of Holding: OSE Treasures 2
May. 21st, 2025 09:14 amjames_davis_nicoll
Recent third-party tabletop roleplaying adventures for Old-School Essentials.
Bundle of Holding: OSE Treasures 2
Ryuu no Gakkou wa Yama no Ue Kui Ryouko Works By Ryōko Kui
May. 21st, 2025 09:06 amjames_davis_nicoll
An assortment of short pieces from the author of Delicious in Dungeon.
Ryuu no Gakkou wa Yama no Ue Kui Ryouko Works By Ryōko Kui
Meddling parents and inlaws
May. 20th, 2025 09:13 pmconuly posting in agonyaunt1. Dear Eric: We are retired grandparents to 7-year-old twins who live close by. We are delighted to help with kiddo chauffeuring, grocery shopping or anything else needed by two very hard-working parents.
Today after dropping off groceries, my wife noted that the refrigerator, in her opinion, had an unpleasant odor and was very quick to share her opinion with my son-in-law. She is also rather critical of many of his habits. And her opinions are not without merit. But my mother always said, "less said, better mended."
When I say to my wife, "too much mother-in-law," I catch hell.
I think something has to be said to mend this or should I just go back to my corner?
– Too Many Opinions
( Read more... )
******
2. DEAR ABBY: I lost my daughter to cancer five years ago. She was only 36. She left behind a husband and three children, ages 3, 5 and 7. While my daughter and her husband worked, I was their "nanny granny" five days a week. I would also take them overnight on weekends. More often than not, I had more waking hours with my grands than their parents did. We were extremely close and bonded.
After my daughter passed, my son-in-law asked me to move in to help. I was in a position to do so, and it went OK the first year. Then some cracks began to show, and we ended up having a huge fight over money (though it wasn't REALLY about money). After I said some horrible things about him on Facebook, he took the grands away from me. It has been two years, and I have begged his forgiveness to no avail. What can I do? -- MISSING THEM IN MARYLAND
( Read more... )
**********
3. DEAR ABBY: I have a full-time job and am in pretty good health. I have one son, "Brian," who is married and has three children. My problem is that my son is often rude to me. I was a single mom who raised him on my own. I thought I was a pretty good mother. His wife is super sensitive to any comment I make and finds fault with almost anything I do. They spend a lot of time with her family and exclude me.
If I make a comment about Brian's wife, he gets mad and calls me hateful or rude. I have been good to both of them, helping in any way I can, yet they do not take that into consideration. Brian and I get into arguments over this. Sometimes I have gone overboard and told him he needs to figure out what his problem is with me. He never tells me why he behaves like this. They don't visit me or bring the children over. They say they are busy, but they always find time to visit her family, their cousins, etc.
Must I give up on having any kind of relationship with them? I love my son and would like to be a part of his life, but I don't think I should accept him being critical of me all the time no matter what I do. If I try to talk objectively with his wife, she says I'm trying to start something. Please help. -- HEARTBROKEN IN GEORGIA
( Read more... )
*********
4. DEAR HARRIETTE: My family and I are gearing up for our annual family vacation. My oldest child is in a relationship and has been badgering me about wanting to bring his girlfriend. I would prefer not to bring her along on an intimate weeklong trip because I feel that her clothing can be rather revealing, and she doesn't seem shy about PDA. I have two much younger children, and I don't think they need to be exposed to that on their summer getaway. Besides, I don't plan to pay for some sort of couples' trip while the rest of us are trying to catch up and bond.
I shared my stance with my son and explained that it's OK for some things to be family-only, and he's now refusing to join us unless I extend an invitation to his girlfriend. My son is already away at college, so his younger siblings really cherish the time they spend with him on these vacations. I'm torn here. Are my concerns unreasonable? -- Vacation Ultimatum
( Read more... )
Today after dropping off groceries, my wife noted that the refrigerator, in her opinion, had an unpleasant odor and was very quick to share her opinion with my son-in-law. She is also rather critical of many of his habits. And her opinions are not without merit. But my mother always said, "less said, better mended."
When I say to my wife, "too much mother-in-law," I catch hell.
I think something has to be said to mend this or should I just go back to my corner?
– Too Many Opinions
( Read more... )
2. DEAR ABBY: I lost my daughter to cancer five years ago. She was only 36. She left behind a husband and three children, ages 3, 5 and 7. While my daughter and her husband worked, I was their "nanny granny" five days a week. I would also take them overnight on weekends. More often than not, I had more waking hours with my grands than their parents did. We were extremely close and bonded.
After my daughter passed, my son-in-law asked me to move in to help. I was in a position to do so, and it went OK the first year. Then some cracks began to show, and we ended up having a huge fight over money (though it wasn't REALLY about money). After I said some horrible things about him on Facebook, he took the grands away from me. It has been two years, and I have begged his forgiveness to no avail. What can I do? -- MISSING THEM IN MARYLAND
( Read more... )
3. DEAR ABBY: I have a full-time job and am in pretty good health. I have one son, "Brian," who is married and has three children. My problem is that my son is often rude to me. I was a single mom who raised him on my own. I thought I was a pretty good mother. His wife is super sensitive to any comment I make and finds fault with almost anything I do. They spend a lot of time with her family and exclude me.
If I make a comment about Brian's wife, he gets mad and calls me hateful or rude. I have been good to both of them, helping in any way I can, yet they do not take that into consideration. Brian and I get into arguments over this. Sometimes I have gone overboard and told him he needs to figure out what his problem is with me. He never tells me why he behaves like this. They don't visit me or bring the children over. They say they are busy, but they always find time to visit her family, their cousins, etc.
Must I give up on having any kind of relationship with them? I love my son and would like to be a part of his life, but I don't think I should accept him being critical of me all the time no matter what I do. If I try to talk objectively with his wife, she says I'm trying to start something. Please help. -- HEARTBROKEN IN GEORGIA
( Read more... )
4. DEAR HARRIETTE: My family and I are gearing up for our annual family vacation. My oldest child is in a relationship and has been badgering me about wanting to bring his girlfriend. I would prefer not to bring her along on an intimate weeklong trip because I feel that her clothing can be rather revealing, and she doesn't seem shy about PDA. I have two much younger children, and I don't think they need to be exposed to that on their summer getaway. Besides, I don't plan to pay for some sort of couples' trip while the rest of us are trying to catch up and bond.
I shared my stance with my son and explained that it's OK for some things to be family-only, and he's now refusing to join us unless I extend an invitation to his girlfriend. My son is already away at college, so his younger siblings really cherish the time they spend with him on these vacations. I'm torn here. Are my concerns unreasonable? -- Vacation Ultimatum
( Read more... )
Estrangement!
May. 20th, 2025 08:00 pmconuly posting in agonyaunt1. Dear Eric: My brother has children with whom I was extremely close when he and his wife got divorced in 1989. He never supported his kids, never paid child support and drank away everyone’s money, including $20,000 in rehabs that my parents paid for.
My brother asked me if he could borrow $5,000, and he would start making payments to pay it back. For the sake of my niece and nephew, I loaned him the money. Unbeknownst to me, my brother was borrowing money from everyone in the family. Soon, everyone in the family found out what he was doing and cut him off.
Fast-forward to three years ago (I’m now 56, and my brother is 72), he reached out to me again. Not to borrow or pay back money, but to reconnect. Through our limited conversations, he keeps asking for my address or an invite to my house. I never extended the offer, and I did not give him my address.
Brother recently told me he has been sending $200 to $300 every couple of weeks to my niece, now 40, a divorced mother of one son. He is also putting several hundred dollars a month in a trust for her 9-year-old son. I told him, on several occasions, since he has money to spare, he can send me money each month to pay me back. He laughs and blows me off.
I’m extremely ticked off that he disregards the sacrifice I made.
I blew off my brother and the $5,000 years ago and I don’t care to rekindle relationships that have been dead for 35 years. What I want is the $5,000 repaid. I have two kids in college and I’m partially retired. I’m not charging him interest for the past 35 years, but I should. I don’t think I can be blunter with my request, nor because of the time that has passed, would I have legal recourse.
If you have suggestions, I would appreciate the help.
– 5k Would Make My Day
( Read more... )
***
2. Dear Annie: I never thought I would be in this position, but I have become estranged from my adult daughter. We used to be incredibly close. When she was younger, we had long talks late into the night, and we would laugh until we cried on road trips. I was there for every heartbreak, every success, and I truly believed we had a bond that would last a lifetime.
But over the past few years, things began to shift. She started pulling away and setting boundaries I did not fully understand. Small disagreements turned into long silences. One day, she stopped returning my calls. I reached out with cards, messages and birthday gifts for the grandchildren, but I rarely get a response. She has told me she needs space, but she will not say why or what I did to cause this distance.
I have apologized more than once for anything I might have done to hurt her, even though I do not know exactly what it is. I feel like I am grieving someone who is still alive. I miss her every single day, and the pain of being cut off from my grandchildren is almost too much to bear. I see photos online and feel like I am watching their lives go on without me.
I want to respect her wishes, but I am also holding on to hope that one day we might reconnect. Is there anything I can do to begin to repair this relationship, or do I need to accept that she may be gone from my life for good? -- Grieving the Distance
( Read more... )
****
3. Dear Annie: I'm struggling with how to move forward after my adult daughter, "Rachel," cut me off two years ago. We used to be close. I raised her as a single mom after her father left, and we leaned on each other through a lot. Things started to change after she got married. Her husband, though polite, has always kept a distance from me. I tried to respect that, but honestly I felt pushed out. It feels like the beginning of their relationship marked the end of ours.
Our last real conversation ended badly. I had asked if they would consider spending part of the holidays with me instead of always going to his family. Rachel got defensive and said I was making her choose. I said something in the heat of the moment that I regret: I told her she'd understand when she had kids of her own. She hasn't spoken to me since.
I've sent birthday cards, texts and an apology letter, but she never replies. I don't know if I should keep reaching out or give her space. I miss her terribly, but I also don't want to keep reopening the wound. How do I respect her boundaries without giving up hope? -- Left Behind in Louisville
( Read more... )
My brother asked me if he could borrow $5,000, and he would start making payments to pay it back. For the sake of my niece and nephew, I loaned him the money. Unbeknownst to me, my brother was borrowing money from everyone in the family. Soon, everyone in the family found out what he was doing and cut him off.
Fast-forward to three years ago (I’m now 56, and my brother is 72), he reached out to me again. Not to borrow or pay back money, but to reconnect. Through our limited conversations, he keeps asking for my address or an invite to my house. I never extended the offer, and I did not give him my address.
Brother recently told me he has been sending $200 to $300 every couple of weeks to my niece, now 40, a divorced mother of one son. He is also putting several hundred dollars a month in a trust for her 9-year-old son. I told him, on several occasions, since he has money to spare, he can send me money each month to pay me back. He laughs and blows me off.
I’m extremely ticked off that he disregards the sacrifice I made.
I blew off my brother and the $5,000 years ago and I don’t care to rekindle relationships that have been dead for 35 years. What I want is the $5,000 repaid. I have two kids in college and I’m partially retired. I’m not charging him interest for the past 35 years, but I should. I don’t think I can be blunter with my request, nor because of the time that has passed, would I have legal recourse.
If you have suggestions, I would appreciate the help.
– 5k Would Make My Day
( Read more... )
2. Dear Annie: I never thought I would be in this position, but I have become estranged from my adult daughter. We used to be incredibly close. When she was younger, we had long talks late into the night, and we would laugh until we cried on road trips. I was there for every heartbreak, every success, and I truly believed we had a bond that would last a lifetime.
But over the past few years, things began to shift. She started pulling away and setting boundaries I did not fully understand. Small disagreements turned into long silences. One day, she stopped returning my calls. I reached out with cards, messages and birthday gifts for the grandchildren, but I rarely get a response. She has told me she needs space, but she will not say why or what I did to cause this distance.
I have apologized more than once for anything I might have done to hurt her, even though I do not know exactly what it is. I feel like I am grieving someone who is still alive. I miss her every single day, and the pain of being cut off from my grandchildren is almost too much to bear. I see photos online and feel like I am watching their lives go on without me.
I want to respect her wishes, but I am also holding on to hope that one day we might reconnect. Is there anything I can do to begin to repair this relationship, or do I need to accept that she may be gone from my life for good? -- Grieving the Distance
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3. Dear Annie: I'm struggling with how to move forward after my adult daughter, "Rachel," cut me off two years ago. We used to be close. I raised her as a single mom after her father left, and we leaned on each other through a lot. Things started to change after she got married. Her husband, though polite, has always kept a distance from me. I tried to respect that, but honestly I felt pushed out. It feels like the beginning of their relationship marked the end of ours.
Our last real conversation ended badly. I had asked if they would consider spending part of the holidays with me instead of always going to his family. Rachel got defensive and said I was making her choose. I said something in the heat of the moment that I regret: I told her she'd understand when she had kids of her own. She hasn't spoken to me since.
I've sent birthday cards, texts and an apology letter, but she never replies. I don't know if I should keep reaching out or give her space. I miss her terribly, but I also don't want to keep reopening the wound. How do I respect her boundaries without giving up hope? -- Left Behind in Louisville
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Well, crap
May. 20th, 2025 03:53 pmjames_davis_nicollGot a notice from Campus Health that I may have been exposed to measles in Hagey Hall on the 8th, between 5 PM and 11 PM.
Oddly, that's not a one-to-one correspondence with my shift on the 8th. My shift started at 3:45 PM. The client's company was there before me, so if they were the source, the warning should begin earlier. I wonder what time Plant Ops evening shifts begin?
Oddly, that's not a one-to-one correspondence with my shift on the 8th. My shift started at 3:45 PM. The client's company was there before me, so if they were the source, the warning should begin earlier. I wonder what time Plant Ops evening shifts begin?
That Leviathan, Whom Thou Hast Made by Eric James Stone
May. 20th, 2025 09:01 amjames_davis_nicoll
A horny but pious Mormon and a hot but godless scientist witness the wrath of an angry god.
That Leviathan, Whom Thou Hast Made by Eric James Stone
Bundle of Holding: Old-School Essentials Advanced Fantasy Bundle
May. 19th, 2025 01:58 pmjames_davis_nicoll
Rulebooks, Adventure Anthologies, + 4 adventures for the Old-School Essentials tabletop roleplaying rules set from Necrotic Gnome.
Old-School Essentials Advanced Fantasy Bundle